I know two brothers who years ago had a disagreement that turned into a bitter argument lasting for decades. The older brother tried to reach out, but the boy refused to forgive and refused to speak to his brother at all. He had taken offense and built a wall between them.

One day, alone in his house, the offended younger brother slipped on a wet floor and fell and hit his head. He bled to death in an empty house, only to be discovered by officers doing a social check. This younger brother was my father.

In my March 28 column in The Daily Courier, I asked the question, “Are you a builder or a towing company during the COVID-19 pandemic?” I pointed out the stark contrast I had seen between two different types of people – those with hope, determination, patience, and charity, and those who cast doubt, discord, judgment, and blame.

Today I want to tell a short fairy tale that I heard as a younger man. It has been passed down and modified over generations, but the message it contains shows two types of builders – builders of barriers and builders of bridges.

Once upon a time, two brothers who lived on adjacent farms got into conflict. It was the first serious rift between them in 40 years of farming side by side, sharing machines, and trading workers and goods as needed without conflict.

Then the long collaboration fell apart. It started with a little misunderstanding and developed into a big difference. Eventually it exploded into an exchange of bitter words, followed by weeks of silence.

One morning there was a knock on the older brother’s door. He opened it and found a man with a carpenter’s tool box.

“I’m looking for a few working days,” said the carpenter. “Maybe you have a few little jobs here and there that I could help with?”

“Yes,” said the older brother. “I have a job for you. Look across the creek at this farm. This is my neighbor; In fact, it is my younger brother. Last week there was a meadow between us and he brought his bulldozer to the dike and now there is a stream between us. Well, he may have done this to piss me off, but I’ll do better for him. Do you see that pile of wood next to the barn? I want you to build me a fence – an 8 foot fence – so I don’t have to see his place or his face anymore. “

The carpenter said, “I think I understand the situation. Show me the nails and the post-hole digger and I can do a job you like. “

The older brother had to go into town so he helped the carpenter get the materials ready and then he was gone for the day.

The carpenter worked hard all day, measuring, sawing and nailing. Towards sunset, when the farmer returned, the carpenter had just finished his work.

The farmer’s eyes widened, his jaw dropped. There was no fence at all. It was … a bridge – a bridge that stretched from one side of the creek to the other. Nice piece of work, handrails and everything – and the neighbor, his younger brother, came up to her with his arms outstretched. The younger brother exclaimed, “You’re quite a bloke to build this bridge after I’ve said and done everything.”

The two brothers stood at each end of the bridge, and then they met in the middle, took each other’s hand, and then hugged.

They turned and saw the carpenter lift his toolbox on his shoulder.

“No wait! Stay a couple of days. I have many other projects for you, ”said the older brother.

“I would like to stay,” said the carpenter, “but I have to build a lot more bridges.”

Each of us will have times when we build walls – unable to go beyond our pride or anger, or problems we may have taken upon ourselves, or problems that were not caused by ourselves. Cultivating such anger, insult, and resentment builds some of the tallest walls and thickest barriers that separate families and friendships.

In this story, the older brother opened the door and let the carpenter into his life. Are we ready to let go of past wrongdoings? Can we forgive a brother, sister, mother, father, or friend? Are we ready to forgive ourselves?

During this COVID-19 pandemic, many of us took the time to reevaluate what is really important in our lives. May we be carpenters and build bridges that mend and heal before the construction time is over. I am grateful to those who built bridges in my life and gave me the opportunity to start over.

Richard Haddad is editor of the Prescott News Network, which includes The Daily Courier, Prescott Valley Tribune, and Chino Valley Review.

The post Haddad: 2 brothers, a fence and a smart carpenter | The Each day Courier first appeared on DECKSAND FENCES DAILY.